How to both survive and enjoy your wedding day
By Hollie Allen

We have all heard the disastrous stories about wedding day bloopers and blunders. Some of us have even lived to tell about them. The wrong flowers arrived moments before the ceremony. One of the groomsmen did not have a coat. The minister got stuck in traffic on the way to the service or got lost and ended up in the next state. With so many details that have to be perfect, there are bound to be mishaps. By some careful planning and always having a “Plan B,” it is true that you can not only survive your wedding day, but also actually enjoy it.

Shop for your gown early.
First things first. There is that white gown that you have dreamt about since you were a small child. We all, well, all of us girls, played "wedding" by clipping that pillowcase over our head like a “blusher” and pretending that our frilly slip we had to wear on Sundays was our dress. How do you shop for a dress you've spent all your life dreaming about? With an idea, some time, and a supportive friend…

You should consider your own personal style. You will be immortalized in this dress. Do you really want puffy sleeves? Are you trendy? Cultured? Elegant? Classic? What do you want your dress to say about you?
Next, you have to think about the fabric. Do you want yards and yards of lace or tulle? Maybe satin or matte satin would be a better choice. In considering all these styles, you might want to think about whether your wedding will be inside or outside, formal or informal. This may sway you in both the design of a gown as well as the fabric.

In the shopping process, there will be several places where you can get a dress that range from JC Penny's to David's Bridal to Suzette, the designer. You should shop from six to 12 months in advance for your dress. This way your gown will have plenty of time to be ordered, shipped, and altered. If you go to a personal designer, this time will also allow for fitting after fitting so that the perfection you desire can be attained.

Remember your bridesmaids.
Know that the dresses worn in your wedding are ultimately your choice. With that being said, don't forget about your girls. Thanks to the innovative new styles of the two-piece dresses, you are able to cater more to your bridesmaids' body types. However, you can stay with the traditional dresses in that one matching shade as well. It all depends on what you want to do. You'll want to have a timeline in place, especially if you are getting married in June. You want to get the girls' gowns picked out soon after the wedding date is set. As with the wedding gown, the bridal party may also have to order their dresses. This can take up to eighteen weeks with most stores. And, by deciding on a style early, the girls will be more likely to purchase the dresses ahead of time instead of waiting until the last minute.

Plan the ceremony with political correctness. Once the clothing for the bride and her party is taken care of, the next big item on the agenda is the ceremony. The beginning thoughts for planning the ceremony are similar to the questions you ask yourself before you purchase the dress. What kind of mood do you want to convey? And will it be conveyed inside or outside? If you are getting married in June in the South, you might want to consider the average temperature for that time of year and have your wedding inside. You will need to reserve any building about six to nine months in advance, again depending upon what time of the year you choose to marry. Keep in mind that summer is the most popular season for weddings.

(Just a side note: Look at the amount of travel time guests will have to put into attending your wedding. If you are marrying in Ireland, but your bridle party is coming from California, you'll have other obstacles to consider.)

Next, you'll want to consider who will perform your wedding ceremony. Will you have a dual religion ceremony or a mutual pastor perform the ceremony? Here, minor advance notice is required. You should consider the popularity of your chosen spiritual advisor. You might also want to think about how well s/he knows the area you will marry in as to avoid the previously mentioned problems of getting lost or stuck in traffic.

Tastefully thank your guests. Lastly, the reception must be carefully planned. This will be the most expensive element of the day and the one that people will remember the most. This is your thank you to all your friends and family for coming out and sharing in your personal celebration of love. Keep it close to the ceremony location. No one wants to take up an entire Saturday driving all over the state. You want the reception location to be easy to find, large enough to hold your guests, and well ventilated. Again, you'll want to reserve the reception location about six to eight months ahead of time. You'll also want to look for a kitchen for your caterer. Keep in mind that most religious establishments will not allow music, or alcohol, in their halls. Get a copy of the rules before signing anything.

Taste the food. You want the cake to be good, right? Ask the caterer for a sample. If you'll be feeding your guests dinner, ask the caterer to prepare a setting for you of the different entrees. Be an educated consumer. This is a thank you, remember?
Meet the entertainers. If you are having music, live or otherwise, meet the entertainers ahead of schedule. You'll want to let them know what you expect at the wedding. Just imagine if your conservative family showed up at your wedding only to find a version of “Lynard Skynard” playing live at your reception.

Leave the minor details of the day up to someone outside of the family. Make sure that you enjoy the day. Put someone in control of payments and minor duty management so you don't have to worry about it. That way, all you’ll need to worry about is not tripping on your stroll down the aisle.

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Copyright © 2002 by Hollie Allen. All rights reserved.

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